I recently returned from a quick trip
to visit my mom. She lives in Alabama, my home state. I say home state because it’s not only the
state where I was born but also where I lived my first 22 years. It’s still
where most of my family lives. It’s where I feel connected because it holds many
ghosts from my past.
When I go home, I bond again to a
rich Southern culture that is rarely understood by anyone except another
Southerner. It has nothing to do with a Confederate flag, the Civil War,
slavery, etc. It has everything to do with a good and decent way of life, with drawling
speech and with kindness to everyone. This culture may be similar to other
parts of the United States or of the world, and I hope it is, but since I have
lived my entire life in the South, its culture is what I know.
While driving through the county roads
that always need maintenance, I thought about how similar they look to all the
times I have driven them before. Sure there are some new buildings along the
way, but not much has changed in the rural/county areas. There are still huge
pine trees, closely-managed pecan groves, long chicken houses, kudzu vines
galore and acres and acres of Southern snow – cotton.
My paternal grandfather was a cotton
farmer and paid people to hand pick the cotton that the mechanical picker left
behind. They carried huge white cloth sacks that took them forever to fill and
they worked all day in the scorching heat. I don’t know how much they were
paid, but it probably wasn’t much. Once when I was around six years old, my grandfather
told me that he’d pay me $.25 to fill a bag. I picked for about five minutes
and left to spend the rest of the day jumping into the cotton-filled wagons.
On my recent trip, I told my fellow
traveler, my 10-year-old granddaughter, all about cotton and its importance to
the South. I told her that when I was her age, I learned in school about
the evil boll weevil, Eli Whitney and his cotton gin, and the cotton farmer’s savior,
George Washington Carver and his peanuts. I was taught Alabama history/civics
in grades 4, 8 and 10, so I know a lot about the history of the state – every important
part from the four major American Indian tribes and the Trail of Tears to the Civil War and slavery to
the governor at the time, George C. Wallace.
I learned all of this history of Alabama and
of the South, but what does it mean to be Southern? It’s not really one thing I
can put my finger on, but I know it’s much more than just being born in one of
the states below the Mason-Dixon Line.
Being Southern means worrying and worrying about
something for a long time and finally letting go of your worry by telling
yourself, “Just turn it over to the Lord.” It’s taking black-eyed peas and a
peach cobbler to a church member’s house when his family member dies because
food is comfort. It’s killing someone with kindness even though you don’t like
the person and you don’t want her to know it, or that person knows you don’t
like her and you want her a little bit paranoid. It’s going to church on Sunday or not going and toting
a huge load of guilt the rest of the week.
Southern food plays a huge part of the
culture. The South is synonymous for fried chicken, turnip greens, corn bread, buttermilk biscuits, fruit cobbler and watermelon. Watching
Paula Deen cook is like being in my grandmother’s kitchen when I was a kid. Oh
my, the food was to die for. Actually, the food caused many early deaths
because much of it contained artery-clogging ingredients like lard and
sugar.
The people who think Southerners are slow
simply because we speak that way are far from wrong. The South is filled with
many smart people who are great spokespersons for this culture. Take former President
Jimmy Carter, for example. You may not agree with his politics, but he’s one of
the most intelligent and highly-educated POTUSs. His legacy is not what he
accomplished when he was in office but all that he did to better humanity when
he left the Presidency. And he did it all while still teaching Sunday school
each Sunday.
My quick trip home revitalized me.
Maybe the fields of cotton have the same relaxing effect as sitting by the
beach. Maybe those country roads that are always the same allow me to drive
automatically so I can mentally relive past events. Maybe going home gives me the chance to visit the ghosts of my past and remember what being a Southerner is all about.
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